Balance

Cambodia WAS all that, and more. Loved it. If you haven't already seen these, you can check 'em out: http://picasaweb.google.com/lindsnol/CambodiaAndSingaporeVacation#.

As for adoption...I'm just going to go ahead and get it out there: I can be obsessive. This is not the greatest attribute a person can have to begin with, but I think adoption can cause the most laid-back person to obsess on a daily (possibly hourly) basis. As soon as I get a response/answer to one thing, I'm on to the next. And oddly, when it feels like there is nothing I can obsess about, I feel worse than if I were doing my thing.

You see, there are very few things that adoptive mothers/father-to-be actually can control in this process. If I were actually pregnant I could do all sorts of productive things every day, or at least every week. I could start buying stuff and getting the baby's room ready without feeling that I would jinx myself. I could tick off the days and see my belly grow and think about my baby at each stage. I could read books...well, I'm doing plenty of that.

The paperwork phase was good for productivity. There was a mound of requirements, and I could tick each task off neatly as accomplished. Now, everything depends on someone else, or someone's government. We were told that our dossier was supposed to be in Ethiopia by the end of the week. Well, end of the week is here and haven't heard anything. Why is this important? Because now I can start waiting for a court date!

And here's another thing: I'm an extremely optimistic person by nature. With that, I'm just going to go ahead and think that it's possible for us to get a court date before rainy season. Now my brain also tells me that this is unlikely, and I shouldn't set myself up for disappointment and...more obsessing. But really, is there any other choice?

At school, a good day involves me actually doing my planning/grading during my planning period, and leaving school feeling like I was actually doing my job properly that day. Sadly, that was the case probably 2/5 days last week. It takes so much willpower not to...

1. Write the mysterious lady at USCIS twice a day and ask her about our fingerprints
2. Search through my agency's bloglist and older posts for information on...you name it
3. Look at Ethiopian/African baby names online
4. Research Ethiopian climate patterns from the last 10 years
5. Look at flights to Ethiopia...

And the list goes on.

But, when I get home, and talk to my husband, I find sanity. We drink a beer together, cook dinner, and listen to music. We talk about other stuff--holidays, moving, gossip, family, school, AND adoption. He balances me.